Episode 26 - Tension

We all feel it—pressure creeping in from all directions. In this episode of Hard Reset, Jeuse Kastoan dives into the invisible weight of tension—the kind that builds slowly, fed by doubt, outside noise, and inner frustration. But instead of letting it snap you, this episode shows how to vent with purpose, channel your energy, and stay focused on what matters most: your work.

Forget what they say. Forget what they think. This one’s about holding it together until you break through.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:02

We are now at season two of Far Reset. This episode is gonna be about tension. I don't know how the first season went, but this season's gonna be a little different. No intros, no outros. He's gonna get straight to it. Tension. Um let's not even say tension right now. Let's say build up. You know, things happen, it seems to not go your way, and it just keeps building and building and building. That tension is what can lead to either greatness or discussion. Now, the thing about it is for me in my life, there's always been tension, there's always been buildup. But I always manage to not have it explode. For me, it's more so you gotta center yourself. There's always gonna be annoyances, there's always gonna be people doing things to bother you. It's always gonna happen. Or at least for me in my case. Um I'm not a very social person, I don't really go out like that. I really just chill. And when I go to work, I'm the same exact way. I'm gonna chill and I do my job, and then I keep pushing. Yet it seems while I'm doing my job, uh there are times where uh, you know, things happen and it's like, okay, um just trying to be nice.

SPEAKER_01 1:40

No need for any kind of animosity or anything, but they happen. And in the end, as they continue to happen, the only thing that you can do is stay focused and do what you need to do. You know what I'm saying? Stay focused on your work, stay focused on the goal.

SPEAKER_00 2:05

Because in the end, that's what it's all about. It's all about the goal and what you're trying to achieve. There's gonna be things along the way that bother you, there's gonna be friction, but you just have to stay focused on what you're trying to do. When you're doing things and say you're doing well, there will be haters.

SPEAKER_01 2:25

In my life, everywhere that I've worked, I've managed to have haters.

SPEAKER_00 2:32

And it's not due to me going out of my way to treat people badly or being an asshole or anything. It's literally just they don't like who I am or what I stand for, or I couldn't tell you what their reasoning is, and honestly, it doesn't matter what their reasoning is, and then it's all about you focusing on what you need to do. So you can literally do nothing and just work and stay focused on that, treat people nicely. Doesn't mean that they'll like you, and it doesn't mean that they have to like you, but do they have to like you? They don't at all. There's nothing requiring them to like you, they're not obligated to like you, they don't have to like you. So, why spend your time worrying about why people dislike you? There's no gate. Part of the reason is that I had my suicide attempt was because I was so caught up on why don't these people like me? Oh, why are people treating me badly? And then it doesn't fucking matter. It doesn't matter how much you try to do well and try to do good by people, it doesn't mean that they're gonna do well by you. So in the end, you can't worry about what people think about you, you can't worry about whether people like you or not, you can't worry about whether you're making a good impression. The only thing you can worry about is whether you're being true to yourself and being a good person. That's it. Everything else is just outside noise. In the end, you as a person, your inner core, are you doing everything you can to be the best person you can be, to treat people well and working hard.

SPEAKER_01 4:18

That's it. Don't need to focus on anything else.

SPEAKER_00 4:23

I've noticed in my lifetime pretty much when I'm working hard and focused on goals and achieving goals. I always have someone there that is not happy about it. But also, it comes with the territory. And don't let it be that you're competing with that person for whatever achievement or goal is at hand. They're gonna do everything in their power to try to undermine it. I've dealt with it plenty of times. There's always someone trying to undermine what you're doing when you're doing well. Because in the end, they feel if you're doing well, it makes them look bad or don't look as well. Yeah, one thing I've always prided myself on is working. I can outwork anybody. I have no problem working. I love working. That's my thing. That's my solitude, is working. And one thing I always focused on, well, pretty much since I joined the military and got out, was one thing I'm gonna always do is outwork everyone. I had a uh, I forgot what we called it, but I had a binder. And uh, was it like a love me binder or something like that? I don't remember. But it was like a binder that we used to have all of our qualifications and stuff in the navy. And on the cover of my binder, I had a picture of Kobe. And I can't remember what the quote was, but it alluded to the fact of I'ma outwork everyone.

SPEAKER_01 5:55

And I live by that. And I did that.

SPEAKER_00 6:00

And I'll continue to do so. There was a period of time where I want a peace and uh wanna relax and chill and try to be low-key, but in the end, I'm not a person that can be low-key. It's just not possible. Being who I am, it's it's not gonna happen. And it's not because I'm outgoing and I talk to everyone, and you know, I'm just a fresh, friendly, lovely face that, you know, welcomes everyone and talk to everyone. It's literally just due to who I am and how I come off in regards to work and putting in work.

SPEAKER_01 6:40

It uh it makes people notice you. It makes people notice me.

SPEAKER_00 6:47

So then you're really focused on what you're doing. Are you really doing all that work and how are you doing all that work and like what is the process?

SPEAKER_01 6:56

So in the end, that's just how it's gonna be. You'll work hard, you do everything you can, it doesn't matter.

SPEAKER_00 7:06

Do what's good for you, do what makes you happy, do what makes you be able to sit good at night. Because in the end, people aren't always gonna be happy, and in the end, everyone's not gonna be waiting for your success. Now, in regards to tension, all this happens while you're trying to build yourself up and trying to achieve great things, and these people that try to undermine you, they'll do all these things to try to get under your skin, which in the end can be a buildup. But with that being said, the best way to deal with it is, you know, for me it's not necessarily friends, because I only I mean I don't know if I have any real close friends at this point. And I'm more of a lone wolf anyway. I kind of roll on my own, I roll dough. So that's just my life and how I do it. Um I have is like my wife, but other than that, can't say I really have any close friends. But in the end, what you want to do is you want to express it. So instead of keeping it bowel up, you know, you express yourself, you express it through art, you express it through music, you express it through a podcast, you express it through therapy, just whatever you can do to express your frustrations and vent, I guess you would say, instead of just uh letting it bowel up a fester. You do those things, and then you also change your mindset in regards to how you're dealing with people. If you notice that people are trying to get on your skin and undermine you, just let it roll off the shoulder. Like, who cares? You already know what it is, you know what they're trying to do. They're just trying to get you off your spot and get you off your shoulder. So, in the end, it's like, okay, you can do that, that's fine. I'll let you have that. Let them win. You don't need to do anything else. Let them win, stay focused on your craft, and then what you have to do to get better. Because in the long run, they're not gonna really be the reason that you succeed or fail. You will be the reason that you succeed or fail. They're gonna try to assist you to fail. That's all they're trying to do, that's their goal.

SPEAKER_01 9:25

They don't want you to succeed. But in the end, you determine that.

SPEAKER_00 9:31

If you just stay focused and stay on your ground, you'll get to where you want to go, whether it's where you currently are or whether it's a better opportunity somewhere else, you'll find yourself, you'll find your way. You get back to where you need to go. So, this right here is actually uh the first episode of season two of our reset. I hope you enjoyed it.

SPEAKER_01 9:53

I myself, I am James Castone, and this is our reset.